"You Should Take It as a Compliment!"

Often when a woman complains about being catcalled on the street, her frustration is met by the same types of responses: "Just ignore it," "Why are you so upset?" "You should take it as a compliment!" While it is true that some women do in fact find unwarranted comments from men to be flattering (and that is a totally valid opinion for a woman to have), studies have shown that the majority of women do not consider this type of sexual harassment to be at all a compliment.

Before I get too far into this post, I would like to acknowledge that the subject of street harassment is a tricky one. What one woman deems as offensive could be perfectly fine to another woman. The interpretation of a comment is completely subjective, which is why this is such a controversial topic. Many people believe that any type of catcalling is wrong and derogatory towards women, while others think that women need to "get over it" and appreciate the compliment. I would like to say here that while I do not agree that catcalling is at all respectful or complimentary, it really is up to the woman being catcalled to decide how she chooses to interpret it.

To get a sense of this, Sonia Saraiya teamed up with 11 women living in New York and asked them to record "their experiences being objectified and sexually harassed on the city's streets." These experiences were compiled on the blog Catcalled and posted anonymously under Participant #1, 2, 3, etc. These women's opinions about catcalling ranged from "a whole new level of scary" to enjoying "the momentary respite of being an object." However, the main purpose of this project was to explain how "the culture of street harassment" affects women in their daily lives.

Most people assume that street harassment doesn't occur until girls get older, but according to an international study conducted by Hollaback! and Cornell University, the majority of women surveyed reported their first experience with street harassment occurred before the age of 17, with some citing ages as early as 10 and 11. Being exposed to this kind of objectification at such a young age makes it even harder for women to break out of the cycle of harassment. If a woman is brave enough to tell her cat-caller to stop, she is still likely to encounter a negative (and even sometimes dangerous) response.

The controversy surrounding catcalling isn't just about women not wanting to take a compliment either. The men who yell out comments to women on the street aren't simply trying to strike up a conversation or offer some kind words. Because these men who ask women to come home with them or tell them about the obscene things they'd like to them don't genuinely think that these women will take them up on their offer. This kind of harassment stems from wanting to make sure that women know their place in society, as objects and inferiors.

I want to take a step back here and make it clear that I don't think that every guy who offers a woman a compliment has some kind of agenda or that he is fueling the Patriarchy and promoting sexist propaganda. I do, however, think that there is a distinct line between complimenting someone and harassing them. Ignoring women who say that street harassment is not complimentary is invalidating and shows a lack of respect for their viewpoint. Despite the numerous experiences women have shared detailing harassment, some men are still of the opinion that they want to be catcalled. I have even heard men say that if women don't want to be catcalled, then we should simply stay at home. That women wouldn't try to look nice if we didn't want to be complimented on our appearance.

I personally don't accept the idea that someone has a right to harass a woman simply because she decided to leave her house that day. I think that catcalling is disempowering and disrespectful towards women and that we as a society shouldn't allow it to be passed off as complimentary.

I'm Sorry, Can You See My Shoulders?

It is becoming increasingly apparent that there are some pretty big differences in the ways in which girls and boys are treated in school based on their gender and their clothing. Many schools have strict dress codes set in place, and although the language of these policies does not always specify female students, it often targets articles of clothing worn specifically by girls (leggings, skirts, tank tops, etc.). Many young women who wear such articles of clothing are frequently told that they are "distracting" the male students in their classrooms. This sends a clear message to both girls and boys that girls' bodies are dangerous and sexualized and that they are solely responsible for boys' actions toward them. 

I want to take a moment to clarify that I'm not saying that all school dress codes are sexist, or that anyone in violation of the dress code shouldn't be punished for breaking school policy. I think that if a school has a reasonable dress code set in place then there is no reason it shouldn't be followed. I am, however, saying that many of these dress codes exist for the wrong reasons. I think that it would be fair to say that a school dress code is sexist if it disproportionally targets girls, sexualizes young girls' bodies, or at all suggests that that it is these girls' fault for distracting boys.

One specific example of a school dress code that has gone too far happened earlier this school year in Kentucky when Stephanie Dunn got sent to the principle's office for wearing a shirt that did not cover her collar bone. Stephanie's mother, Stacie, was called in to pick her daughter up and criticized the school for such a ridiculous system: "Parents are being called away from their important jobs and students are missing important class time because they are showing their collarbones! Something needs to change!" Stacie Dunn also said in her Facebook post that it was ridiculous that the girls at that school weren't allowed to show their collar bones because it "may distract their male classmates." Stephanie's mother brought her a scarf to attempt to cover up in compliance with the school's dress code but was ultimately sent home anyway for giving the principal an attitude when he told her that the scarf was also (somehow) inappropriate. There is a potential for change within the school however. Stacie noted that the principle called her to set up a meeting, saying that he would be willing to reexamine the school's dress code if she would be willing to put together a proposed policy. 

This dress code controversy has prompted many young women to take a stand against their schools' sexist policies. They are starting movements like "Not 'A' Distraction", in which students in South Carolina wore scarlet A's to school in the style of Hester Prynne to highlight the harm done by enforcing misogynistic values on young women.  There is also the hashtag #IAmMoreThanADistraction which began in 2014 and has picked up momentum during this school year. Started by a group of girls from New Jersey, the group aims to draw attention to the fact that interrupting a girl's school day to have her sent home or change clothes sends a message that making sure that boys have a "distraction free" learning environment is more important than her own education. This hashtag has generated thousands of posts on social media and empowered other young women to speak out against the unfair and often sexist dress code guidelines enforced upon them.

Unfortunately, the policy of policing women on what they can and can't wear doesn't stop in high school. The over-sexualization of women in the workplace is also a growing problem in our society and can be traced directly back to school dress codes: if girls are policed and sexualized at an early age, that impacts what both girls and boys grow up to view as the social norm.